Back in mid-April, America was being teased with pre-premiere series clips of What Would Ryan Lochte Do? Finally drying off the residual pool sprinkles from the Summer Olympics 2012, Lochte took an Olympic-sized break to film his highly-anticipated TV show on E!. While this eye candy is charming the pants off all the 20something, 30something, 40something (and so on) women around the country...he is simulatenously supplying media outlets with tear-inducing material. Everyone in the office was just as uproarious as the Philadelphia Fox 29 Anchors were while watching this Internet-shattering viral video. Naturally, we thought two things: One --- is this show for real? and two --- what would Ryan Lochte read? Editorial Assistant, Emily Hoenig, reports. *Please note for your reading and viewing pleasure that this post is in reference to the May 12th episode of What Would Ryan Lochte Do?
Last week on What Would Ryan Lochte Do?, our favorite Joyce scholar swimmer was friendzoned by tv show gimmick and his one true British love, Jaimee...much to Lochte's --- and America’s --- dismay. But we may have all splurged on Ben and Jerry’s prematurely. This week Ryan bounced back with heartwarming gusto, getting plastered (literally --- he had a mold made of his abs) and coercing fellow Olympian Chantae to put a whole marshmallow in her mouth. Are you as suspicious as I am about how quickly Young Werther Ryan is moving on? Unless love is a swimming competition, I think it’s pretty safe for us to assume that Ryan’s getting help from some external resources. You guessed it...BOOKS!
Although my breakup book of choice is POOPED PUPPIES, I suspect Ryan resorted to something a little more literary --- perhaps a story about the follies of the heart when it comes to first impressions. Perhaps a story about learning to ignore your head and listen to your heart. Perhaps the peerless PRIDE AND PREJUDICE. Ryan, like Elizabeth Bennet, fell hard (AT FIRST!) for a capricious Brit. Mr. Wickham nearly charmed the pants off Lizzie, and then actually charmed the pants off her sister, Lydia. Jaimee, too, infiltrated the Lochte ranks, including tough-as-painted-nails Kristin Lochte, the self-proclaimed protective older sister. Both Elizabeth and Ryan go through harrowing journeys of personal growth (on-page and *off-camera,* respectively) in order to better get to know themselves and figure out the things that are truly important to them. Elizabeth --- integrity and intelligence and real kindness. Ryan --- getting plastered (abs) and competitive sports. But in the end, both heroine and hero realized that "The One" was right in front of them all along, and learned how to say jeah! to true love.
