Editorial Content for We Are Too Many: A Memoir [Kind of]

In 2017, Hannah Pittard published an essay in The Sewanee Review about the affair that ultimately ended her marriage. “Scenes from a Marriage” resonated with readers and, as Pittard notes in her new memoir, led to a question from numerous curious readers: “But what’s the real story?” As Pittard notes, they may have been fishing for “the nasty bits,” but, as she writes, “I think they wanted to know how those details could be shuffled and reshuffled into the characters’ different perceptions of reality. To be honest, so did I.”

"Readers won’t always feel good about following Pittard on this journey, but that’s kind of the point. She digs deep into the darkest places but ultimately finds her way into a new and better light."

The result is WE ARE TOO MANY, which takes a unique formal approach to its topic. The book’s first half is composed of a series of dialogues --- mostly between Hannah and her husband, Patrick, but also between Hannah and her best friend, Trish, the woman with whom Patrick had an affair, and with other friends and family members. These conversations jump forward and backward in time, showing the evolution (the devolution, really) of both a marriage and a friendship. They are uncomfortable and at times painful to read, zeroing in on sharp conversational barbs, lies and betrayals large and small --- and reminding readers that something that once seemed so safe and easy could quickly and easily disintegrate. And, of course, her uniquely painful story traces the devastating loss of two kinds of relationships: a marriage and a long-term friendship, both of which are deeply traumatic.

Pittard also imagines herself into situations where she definitely was not physically present --- the conversation in which Patrick and Trish decide to have sex, for example --- perhaps prompting the book’s subtitle: “A Memoir [Kind of].” And, in a real narrative trick, the final conversation in this section finds an imagined Patrick interrupting Hannah’s version of events, calling her out on how she’s relating her memories of their relationship and how she related to him in real life.

This surprising turn launches the memoir’s second half, which takes a more formally traditional approach, consisting of essay-like chapters in which Hannah addresses Patrick and imagines his responses. Later, she explores her own relationship with food and eating disorders, and she starts to move toward a kind of recovery, both from bulimia and from the grief of divorce. The sections about disordered eating can feel somewhat removed from the rest of the narrative, at least at first. However, their relationship to Hannah’s marriage and friendship, as well as other factors like excessive drinking and her desire not to have children, eventually make more sense.

In the end, Pittard --- now five years removed from the affair that ended her marriage --- finds herself in a healthier place, both physically and emotionally. Readers won’t always feel good about following Pittard on this journey, but that’s kind of the point. She digs deep into the darkest places but ultimately finds her way into a new and better light.