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No One Would Do What the Lamberts Have Done

Review

No One Would Do What the Lamberts Have Done

Sophie Hannah is one of the greatest living mystery writers, and her multilayered novels also span the crime and psychological thriller genres. Her most prominent venture has been continuing the classic Hercule Poirot series originally conceived by Agatha Christie.

Hannah’s latest release, with the lengthy and curious title NO ONE WOULD DO WHAT THE LAMBERTS HAVE DONE, is a whopper of a novel unlike anything she has written previously. In addition to a confounding mystery, it is a family saga that delves into the subjects of loyalty, love and retribution. It is told in a gonzo style that is very tongue-in-cheek at times, and it will keep readers guessing and shaking their heads right up until the end.

"Sophie Hannah inserts nice plot twists, including the narrator’s identity, and enough surprises to keep readers from correctly guessing the ending while submitting to the witty and clever conventions that make up this unique tale."

The action opens with an interesting encounter between Detective Connor Chantree and his superior, Large. Chantree presents a huge case file that resembles a book. At its heart is a situation that calls to mind the Hatfields and the McCoys, but here we have the Lamberts and the Gaveys, upper-middle-class British suburban families. The file is called “No One Would Do What the Lamberts Have Done,” and the author is listed simply as “me.”

A policeman shows up at the Lamberts’ door and informs Sally that the Gaveys have filed a complaint, alleging that the Lamberts' dog, Champ, bit their teenage daughter, Tess. Sally abruptly ushers the officer off of her front stoop after swearing that Champ has not been out of her sight and would never do such a thing. Like many pet owners, the Lamberts --- which include Sally's husband, Mark, and their children, Ree and Toby --- regard Champ as a member of the family. They are frightened that the law will take him away and destroy him.

The Gaveys have long been the bane of the Lamberts’ existence. Their feud and mutual dislike are well-known throughout the neighborhood. The Gaveys are a small clan. Tess’ father, Alastair, is the CEO of a telecommunications company, and her mother, Lesley, is a self-proclaimed podcaster. Now, driven by a strong sense of self-preservation, the Lamberts take off with Champ and put their house on the market immediately.

Sally leans on her friend, Corinne Sullivan, an extremely wealthy woman who for some reason cannot hold down a job. She does all she can to protect them and keep Champ safe. Once word gets out on social media that the Lamberts may be hiding out at one of Corinne’s homes, they decide to take Champ to an upscale kennel and wait it out there with him until they can secure a new place to live. Mark is not on board with any of this, and the exchanges between him and his family are priceless.

Along the way, we get a taste of how the differences between the Lamberts and the Gaveys came to be, making for some very soap opera-worthy moments. When they see the social media posts referring to Tess’ “munched-up arm,” things really go off the rails. As the Lamberts see it, you have to be loyal to your people. Nothing else matters. As a result, the lengths to which they will go to protect Champ are both admirable and wildly unpredictable.

Sophie Hannah inserts nice plot twists, including the narrator’s identity, and enough surprises to keep readers from correctly guessing the ending while submitting to the witty and clever conventions that make up this unique tale.

Reviewed by Ray Palen on January 23, 2026

No One Would Do What the Lamberts Have Done
by Sophie Hannah

  • Publication Date: January 20, 2026
  • Genres: Fiction, Mystery
  • Paperback: 416 pages
  • Publisher: Sourcebooks Landmark
  • ISBN-10: 1464264309
  • ISBN-13: 9781464264306