STUPID WHITE MEN had been on the New York Times bestseller list for 52 consecutive weeks, and, in late April of this year, Michael Moore was giving a dinner to celebrate.

Moore should have been over the moon with joy. After all, STUPID WHITE MEN had been condemned to a premature death by his publisher, which had planned to release it on September 11, 2001, and, that day, decided no one would want to read it. Then the book was revived in a most unlikely way: a letter-writing campaign engineered by librarians. And then the public embraced STUPID WHITE MEN so enthusiastically that it became America's biggest-selling non-fiction book of 2002. At this rate, there'd be no paperback edition for years --- for a writer, it doesn't get sweeter than that.

To my surprise, Michael Moore was gloomy. (How do I know this? I was there. Disclosure: Like a lot of media folk in New York, I've known Michael for years. And I've interviewed him several times.) He wasn't bummed about STUPID WHITE MEN or his new book --- he was depressed about the country. Where was the Democrat who would lead us out of the wilderness? And even if a liberal candidate emerged, how could he (or she) beat the massively-funded President?

Only one person at the table was upbeat. "The wheels are coming off this Administration," he said. "The wheels are coming off."

And now, six months later, it seems that dinner guest was prescient. Iraq hasn't turned out quite as President Bush imagined. It appears the government may need $600 million more in order to find the weapons of mass destruction that it once insisted were poised to be used in minutes (though now the Administration denies Bush or Rice ever said that). The Administration may get a special prosecutor as its reward for leaking the identity of a CIA agent married to a dedicated public servant who failed to serve Bush's interests. The President's poll numbers are falling faster than consumer confidence. A Democratic candidate has emerged who actually fought in a war or two. Al Franken kicked Bill O'Reilly's ass.

And now Michael Moore's new book is out.

Moore is often funny, but never subtle. Here he is not particularly funny --- readers hoping for STUPID WHITE MEN II should be warned. For Moore's purpose is nothing less than the removal of George Bush from the White House.

As he writes, "I don't know how to put it any gentler than to say that these bastards who run our country are a bunch of conniving, thieving, smug pricks who need to be brought down and removed and replaced with a whole new system that we control."

Michael Moore would settle for Bush's defeat in the '04 election.

But he'd much prefer impeachment.

So DUDE, WHERE'S MY COUNTRY? is a weapon of mass instruction --- the rough draft of the case of The People of the United States v. George W. Bush. It begins with seven questions for "George of Arabia." To readers of the liberal press, they're not new; to those in the heartland who aren't political junkies, they will probably be individually disconcerting and collectively upsetting. For they suggest why this Administration would encourage us to believe Saddam Hussein was behind 9/11 --- oops, sorry; the Administration now insists it didn't; 70% of us must have come to that conclusion on our own, in a collective dream, I guess --- when, as Moore reminds us, Saudi fingerprints are all over this attack.

Two facts I didn't know: The Saudis have a trillion bucks invested in our stock market (yikes!) and another trillion in our banks (yowser!), and, forty-eight hours after 9/11, the President smoked a cigar to relax with…his favorite Saudi prince. No wonder the President's promise to tell us everything about 9/11 somehow meant: everything but those 28 pages about the Saudis in the official report which he thoughtfully had whited-out!

Moore is also the first to ask the question we all should have thought of a long time ago: If the White House believed Air Force One was a terror target on 9/11, why did the President fly around the country all day in it? I mean, why not land the damn thing and hunker down in a fortified building?

Much of the book is a primer of America's bad behavior over the last half-century: a laundry list of dictators we've supported, etc. Moore offers a pretty sharp analysis of the ways the White House uses the fear of terrorism to strip us of our rights --- terrorists pay in cash and use disposable cell phones, so who's the real target of the government's desire to collect credit card and cell phone data? There's a pointless chapter allegedly written by Jesus Christ and an excellent chapter on how to talk to your conservative brother-in-law at Thanksgiving (hint: Conservatives aren't really Republicans, they just don't like high taxes).

And then, finally, there is a call to action --- Michael Moore's checklist of things you can do to stop bitching about the way things are and to help change them. Which ends on a hopeful note: "Dude, where's your country? It's right outside your window, just waiting for you to bring it home."

So call him names if that's what gets you off: bombastic, over-simplified, doctrinaire. Get personal if the O'Reilly/Coulter style suits you: slovenly, ill-mannered, crude. But dismiss him at your peril. Because Michael Moore --- once a poor kid from Flint, Michigan --- still knows how to talk to us with a directness and power no politician can match.

And, this time, instead of easy jokes, he delivers the goods.

   --- Reviewed by Jesse Kornbluth

• Click here to buy DUDE, WHERE'S MY COUNTRY from Amazon.com.

Review II by Joe Hartlaub

It's almost reflexive to go after Michael Moore by dismissing him as an obnoxious buffoon with a camcorder, bad hygiene and the fashion sense of dumpster diver. It's difficult not to fall into that trap. I certainly did while writing the first draft of my review of DUDE, WHERE'S MY COUNTRY?. But I threw that all of that out. It diverts attention from the real issue.

Moore, I'm afraid, is not a principled liberal of the type with whom one could reach reasonable disagreement, such as Joe Lieberman, Howard Dean, Susan Estrich, or even my fellow reviewer, Jesse Kornbluth. And DUDE, WHERE'S MY COUNTRY? reveals that for all to see.

Moore has developed a kind of schtick where he comes off as an aggressive panhandler with a political axe to grind. And he's very good at it, all the while assuring us that he loves the United States, supports the military, and would even love the government (really) ---- if it would just be reasonable and do it his way. Until the publication of DUDE, WHERE'S MY COUNTRY? Now, this guy is out of the closet and into the room as an "America hater."

Moore dedicates DUDE to Rachel Corrie, Ardeth Platte, Carol Gilbert and Ann Sparanese. Let's take a look at who these people are, and we'll get a better idea of where Moore is really coming from in DUDE. Rachel Corrie was accidentally killed when she stood in front of a bulldozer which was leveling the home of a Palestinian terrorist. Moore wonders, in his dedication, if he will ever have her courage. Mike, we can only hope.

And who are Moore's other heroes? Well, Platte and Gilbert are doing jail time for committing sabotage on an American military installation in Colorado. So much for supporting our servicemen during a time of war, Dude. Sparanese? She's a contributor to Progressive Librarian, a publication that advocates anarchy for the elite and strict rules for the rest of us. Sparanese apparently was very upset when Moore's book STUPID WHITE MEN was purportedly banned (it wasn't, but why quibble?) and went to bat for Moore. It's helpful to approach DUDE with an understanding of the author's mindset: anti-Israeli and anti-American military. Oh, and pro-anarchy.

With this in mind, let's look at DUDE. Moore takes George Bush to task for, well, just about everything except wearing nicer clothes than Moore does. Chapter One starts the festivities off by trying to connect some nonexistent dots between Bush and the 9/11 terrorists. This is not great journalism or investigative reporting. Anyone can do it. Heck, even I can do it. Watch.

NAMBLA is an organization advocating the legalization of sexual activity between men and boys. NAMBLA members have written books that present the argument for the (no other word will do) liberalization of sexual consent laws. Michael Moore writes books, and is a liberal. Hmmm..do you think...?.See? See how easy that is? Like I said, anyone can do it, but it doesn't mean that everyone, especially Michael Moore, should.

Then there's Chapter Two, entitled "Home of the Whopper," which purports to demonstrate how George Bush lied to get the United States involved in a war with Iraq. Moore's timing, alas, is terrible. Less than a week before DUDE was published, David Kay's interim report concerning Iraq's weapons program was released. You really need to read the whole report. In fact, if you go to www.cia.gov/cia/public_affairs/speeches/2003/david_kay_10022003.html you can do just that instead of relying on headlines from The New York Times. It's uncanny how Kay's report, in toto, refutes practically every point Moore raises.

There are, admittedly, parts of DUDE that are hilarious. Unfortunately for Moore, I don't think that they were meant to be. Take Chapter Seven, entitled "Horatio Alger Must Die." The money line in this chapter is, in boldfaced type, "You are never going to be rich." This was written by a college dropout, who, with the aid of a camcorder, bad attitude, and a sheeplike audience, is now a multimillionaire with two residences, Emmys, an Oscar, and book and film deals. Not bad at all.

Dude, Horatio Alger is you! If what Moore had said elsewhere is true --- that you're finished once they start laughing at you --- he better start running. Here comes the fork. And Chapter Three, "Oil's Well That Ends Well," is the recounting of a dream which Moore purportedly had wherein he is interviewed by his great-granddaughter, Ann Coulter Moore. The concept, unlike the execution, is a side-splitter. Ann Coulter in your family? In your dreams, Dude.

There is one bombshell in DUDE. It recently was revealed that Moore had encouraged Wesley Clark to run for president. Clark is quoted in DUDE as saying he has, and I quote, "twenty-some odd guns around the house." I say this with all seriousness as a card-carrying life member of the National Rifle Association: anyone who owns guns, and doesn't know exactly how many he has, and doesn't know exactly where they are is not smart enough to be trusted with an entire country. Clark, interestingly enough, is for gun control, apparently for everyone but him. I wonder if he knows Ann Sparanese?

Notwithstanding the unintentional Clark revelation, however, DUDE, WHERE'S MY COUNTRY? is a dud. But I can answer the question for Moore that he poses in his title. Where's your country? Why, right under your feet, Dude.

   --- Reviewed by Joe Hartlaub